Funny Rajnikant Quotes

 Rajnikant Quotes

When do earthquakes occur? When Rajnikanth's mobile is on vibration mode!

What would have happened if Rajnikanth was born 150 years ago? The British would have fought for independence!

Rajnikanth woke up one day and decided he would share one per cent of his knowledge with the world. Thus, Google was born!

When Rajnikanth stares at the sun in anger, the sun hides behind the moon, and this phenomena is knows as a Solar Eclipse!

Rajnikanth effect on Google:Open your internet browser,in the address bar type 'googlerajinikanth',Then Hold ctrl button and press enter,And see the result !!

Raknikanth has finished temple run game in his android 109.56

Rajnikanth once taught a child how to play Counter Strike. That child went on to become Osama Bin Laden

Once rajnikanth hit a six and now that ball is called Pluto!!

Once dinosaurs borrowed money from Rajnikanth and refused to pay back.
That was the last time anyone saw dinosaurs!

The game of chess originally had a piece called "Rajinikant " It was
later removed coz in 1 move, it could kill all pawns, knights,brooks,bishops,
dethrone the king and get the Queen pregnant

The missing piece of Apple Inc. logo was officially eaten by Rajinikant

Once formula F1 race was conducted between rajnikanth and Michael Schumacher. Obviously Rajni won but schumacher fainted. REASON: RAJNI Won the race by keeping the vehicle in neutral.

Rajnikant once entered a race, he came first, second & third.

Rajnikant once wrote a cheque, the bank bounced.

Rajinikant doesn't pay attention- attention pays him.

Rajnikant stared at the sun for hours. The sun then blinked

Rajnikant had died 20 yrs ago...death hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.

USA POWER vs INDIAN POWER
USA-
10000 nuclear weapons, 600000 army, 10000 tanks,
12000 air force, 3000 ships
INDIA-
~RAJNIKANTH~

Once… Rajnikant
forgot his toys near Mumbai…..
Now that place is known as
…..”ESSEL WORLD”…….

Mission impossible was first offered to rajnikanth bt he refused bcoz he found the title insulting!!!

Arjun: i can shoot eye of bird.
Rajni: i can shoot bird's eyes cells mitochodria protiens amino acid into two
Arjun: Aap to serious ho gae prabhu

Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined “victim” as “one who has encountered Rajnikanth”.

Rajnikanth is a champion in the game ‘Hide n seek’, as no one can hide from Rajnikanth.

Rajnikanth is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world.

Aliens do indeed exist. They are just too scared to visit a planet that Rajnikanth is on.

When Rajnikanth plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.

Rajnikanth doesn’t answer nature’s call nature answers Rajnikanth’s call!!

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajnikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.

Rajnikanth can build a snowman out of rain!

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Rajanikanth’s PC will crash.

Once Rajni underwent a surgery…anesthesia was administered to the surgeons

When Rajnikanth goes to a gym to workout, no one can workout since Rajini uses all the weights available.

Edam and Eve are children of Rajnikanth

Rajini can eat dosa with chop sticks

Gabbar singh forgets his dialogues when he sees Rajnikanth

The box office collection of the movie Ra 1 was less than parking collection of Robot

Rajnikanth got 150 questions in exam paper asking – “Solve any 100 questions” He solved all 150 and wrote, ” Rascalla!, check any 100!

Once Rajnikanth entered bigg boss…The next day announcement was made… Rajnikanth chahte hai ki bigg boss confession room me aye

Rajnikanth can cure cancer with his first aid box

Munni Badnaam hui Rajnikanth ke liye

If Rajnikanth’s PC hangs… its time for next windows release

Rajnikanth taught yoga to Baba Ramdev

Rajnikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes.

Rajnikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear.

Rajnikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book.

Rajnikanth doesn’t move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajnikanth.

Rajnikanth knows Victoria’s secret.

Water boils faster when Rajnikanth stares at it.

Google won’t find Rajnikanth because you don’t find Rajnikanth; Rajnikanth finds you.

Rajnikanth leaves messages before the beep.

Rajnikanth electrocuted Iron Man.

Rajnikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray.

Rajnikanth goes to court and sentences the judge.

Rajnikanth can teach an old dog new tricks.

Rajnikanth once had a heart attack. His heart lost.

Rajnikanth can lick his elbows.

Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary, Hero etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1949. That was the year Rajnikanth was born.

The statement “nobody can cheat death”, is a personal insult to Rajnikanth. Rajni cheats and fools death everyday.

Rajnikanth can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin.

Time and tide wait for Rajnikanth.

Rajnikanth sneezed only once in his entire life, that’s when the tsunami occurred in the Indian ocean.

Rajnikanth can answer a missed call.

Rajnikanth’s brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhury’s.

The quickest way to a man’s heart is with Rajnikanth’s fist.

Rajnikanth doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

Rajnikanth killed the dead sea.

Rajnikanth makes onions cry.

Rajnikanth once wrote a cheque, the bank bounced!

Rajnikanth can drown a fish.

Rajnikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.

Rajnikanth knows Victoria’s secret.

If Rajni was born 100 years earlier, British would have fought to get independence from India.

Rajnikanth’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajnikanth.

Once a cobra bit Rajnikanth’s leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

Rajnikanth can kill two stones with one bird.

Rajnikanth has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of life there.

Micheal Jordan to Rajnikanth: I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you? Rajni: Rascala, how do you think the earth spins?

Rajnikanth has counted to infinity, twice.

Rajnikanth can delete the Windows Recycle Bin.

Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Rajnikanth can throw Brett Favre even further.

 Hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Rajnikanth can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.

Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajnikanth.

When you say “no one’s perfect”, Rajnikanth takes this as a personal insult.

Rajnikanth is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

It takes Rajnikanth 20 mins to watch 60 minutes

There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Rajnikanth lives in Chennai

Rajnikanth once consumed an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink once.

The only thing that runs faster and longer than Rajnikanth are his films.

Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajnikanth there is no other way. 

Ek Baar Ek Ladke Ne Rajanikant Ki Beti Ko Aankh Mari. Rajanikant Ne Uske Haath, Pair Aur Sar Mod Diya. Aaj Duniya Us Ladke Ko Baba Ramdev Ke Naam se janti hai....

Breaking News: Do Din Light Jane Ki Wajah Pata Chal Gayi Hai. Rajanikanth Apna Mobile Aur New Tablet Charge Kar Raha Tha.

Rajnikanth did his KG from seven different schools. Today those institutions are known as IITs!

Rajnikanth wanted to write a blog.. and now we have Wikipedia

who can sing a group song alone ?? A. Raavan ….. Everytime the answer isn’t #Rajnikanth

Rajnikanth knows who let the dogs out.

Wires get electric current when they touch rajnikanth.

Once hanuman were caught reading ….rajnikanth chalisa.

This diwali eat “rajnikant sweets” ….a perfect cure for diabetes.

Rajni once slept with a truck ,it is now called optimus prime.

ChemicalX used by professor to create the powerpuff girls was rajni’s spit!!

Rajnikanth once chucked the Bruce out of lee n made chucklee.

Rajnikant once made toilet papers but then no one could use it cause it wouldn’t take anyone’s shit!

Principal: what u want to become in future?
Student: After studying MBBS, I want to join Police force n get good job in a good software company nd work as lawyer n construct big buildings n conduct research nd become actor...
Principal: Hey, Wat's ur name?
Student: Rajnikant...!!!

There is no such thing as global warming. Rajinikanth was cold, so he turned the sun up.

Rajinikanth once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!".

When Rajinikanth shows you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

The Pyramids of Egypt are actually Rajnikanth's primary school craft projects!

NASA does not exist anymore. Rajnikanth bought all the rockets for Diwali!